Eduardo Munoz Alvarez/Getty Images

Terrifying Things Heard on the Philadelphia Police Scanner After the Eagles Won the Super Bowl

“Someone lit a Christmas tree on fire.”

10:20 p.m. “Thousands going south on Broad Street from Spring Garden.”

10:36 p.m. “We need somebody at Broad and Walnut, southwest corner. People on the pole.”

Advertisement

10:40 p.m. “I got about 2,000 college students coming from Walnut Street to 30th to Center City.”

10:46 p.m. “It’s endless, chief. Endless.”

10:50 p.m. “I got people coming up the ramps on 676 eastbound. I don’t have a clue how they’re getting up … Should I go up to get those people off 676?”

10:53 p.m. “About four stories above the Wawa we got people out on the ledge. I can’t tell how they came up. If they’re not allowed to be there can we get them down? … They’re coming out of the window up there.”

10:57 p.m. “Be advised that someone is flying a drone in the area at 1-5 and Market.”

Advertisement

11 p.m. “At 15th they’re lighting off fireworks.”

11:04 p.m. “We got a large crowd at City Hall climbing the fence.”

11:11 p.m. “They’re on top of trash trucks. There is to be no one on top of trash trucks, guys.”

11:14 p.m. “We have multiple people on Broad Street swinging on light poles.”

Advertisement

11:20 p.m. “Climbing the trash trucks at 13th and Market.”

11:23 p.m. “I got a group jumping up and down on tractor trailers now. Two white men in black jackets and blue jeans.”

Eagles fans celebrate their victory in Super Bowl LII against the New England Patriots on Sunday night in Philadelphia.

11:25 p.m. “I need to get the fire extinguisher out of my trunk. I got a fire on Broad Street just south of South. Someone lit a Christmas tree on fire.”

Advertisement

11:26 p.m. “They just flipped a car over here. If you could get a medical response team over here, I’d greatly appreciate it.”

11:35 p.m. “Do you have medics over here coming to 17th and Lombard? We have a female here who was assaulted.”

11:37 p.m. “This is extremely horrible. We need rescue here. We got someone horribly injured from a fall.”

11:38 p.m. “They’re trying to tear multiple light posts down and I don’t have anyone to counteract it right now.”

Advertisement

11:42 p.m. “They’re climbing up the fire escape onto the roof of the building”

11:44 p.m. “A man jumped off the light pole and landed on his head.”

11:45 p.m. “We have a light pole down. On the east side of Macy’s corner. We have live wires.”

A fan celebrates in Center City, Philadelphia, after the Eagles defeated the New England Patriots to win the Super Bowl on Sunday.
Advertisement

11:48 p.m. “I got two down that fell off these light poles at Broad and Arch.”

11:51 p.m. “On the southeast corner the pole is about to collapse. There are about 40 of them on there.”

11:53 p.m. “We have a large crowd throwing bottles and chanting ‘Meek Mill.’ “

11:55 p.m. “We have a large fight at Broad and Ellsworth.”

Advertisement

11:58 p.m. “I got a male in custody in this location. He’s saying he’s an off-duty cop.”

12:11 a.m. “On Juniper and Market traffic lights are down. All signs are down.”

12:12 a.m. “At Broad and Market they’re throwing bottles at the cops. Please send SWAT teams over there in case we need them.”

12:24 a.m. “I got somebody jumping on top of the fire truck now.”

Advertisement

Also in Slate: In 2012, Will Oremus warned that we shouldn’t believe everything we hear on police scanners.

More from Culture

Does Black Panther Say “Vibranium” As Much As Avatar Says “Unobtanium”?

Four Theories on Why the United States is Having Such a Crummy Winter Olympics

Trevor Noah Has Some Terrible Ideas for Addressing School Shootings

The New Silicon Valley Trailer Has a Secret Message

The Men of the Norwegian Curling Team Wear Flamboyant Pants. Does That Make Them Jerks?

Do Ice Dancing Partners Get a Bump in Their Scores if They’re Sex Partners?